Whether it’s a consistent clash at work with a certain coworker, a nagging feeling about a project, a sinking fear when applying for jobs, or frustration around workload, our emotions are sending us important messages every day. But a duality exists when it comes to these emotional signals, yes, they are valid, AND they are not the full story. It’s up to us to uncover the full story rather than ignore these important signals.
For your consideration, what if the clash with your coworker is happening because your creative needs aren’t being met? You may find yourself consistently offering advice on their projects because, since your last promotion, those opportunities have been taken off your plate. They interpret it as you undermining them, and so the drama ensues.
A sinking fear when it comes to applying for jobs might be tied to the fear of ending up in another bad role. After all, imposter syndrome often accompanies the very jobs you’d be most excited to pursue, so you don’t find yourself applying for those roles, and your intuition may be trying to warn you away from another negative situation.
To be clear, it would be rare for someone to immediately spot these underlying components beneath the surface. If someone thinks they can, the likelihood of being mistaken is high. Each person and each situation is completely unique, with its own circumstances, emotions, people, and implications at play.
“Ready to apply these insights to your own journey?”
So then, how do these realizations arise? Through the emotional vulnerability of someone who is genuinely seeking to answer the question, “What’s behind that?” And then, “What’s behind THAT?” You see, it usually takes patient digging to find the real reason behind a situation or feeling.
For instance, maybe you are doing the dishes and get a wave of sadness. You take a deep breath and gently ask yourself, “What’s behind that?” Your mind goes to a specific memory or situation, and you’re not sure how it relates. So again, patiently, you ask yourself, “What’s behind that?” Until, with some introspection, patience, and curiosity, you begin to understand what your intuition is trying to tell you. Instead of ignoring the emotional signal, you become more attuned to it.
Some feelings or situations are harder to unpack on your own. In those cases, a coach can be immensely helpful. Of course, a coach can ask many variations of questions, but ultimately, it’s a process rooted in curiosity and compassion that leads to deeper emotional understanding, and, in turn, meaningful progress in the area you’ve been grappling with.
So next time you’re facing a difficult situation and strong feelings arise, take the time to listen to yourself. Your emotions are incredibly intelligent. Instead of dismissing them as impractical or illogical, tune in and ask, “What’s behind that?” And then, “What’s behind that?”
